In June 2017, I was laid off from a position in journalism and opted to use the summer months for temporary employment and savings, aiming to fund travels during autumn. Upon returning to the U.S. in December, I believed I was prepared to secure another opportunity within the field of journalism. To economize on living expenses, I resided at my parents’ place.
Throughout the span of one year, I
applied for numerous positions
. Some resulted in emails with the hiring manager or recruiter. Others progressed to the initial phone call. At least one advanced to a series of seven interviews.
rounds of interviews
At the conclusion of each process, there was never an offer extended to me. Within just the initial six-month period, I went through interviews with over 10 distinct companies without success. None of them chose to employ me.
Being turned down repeatedly was incredibly discouraging. I felt utterly useless. It led me into depression. Who was I without the identity my job provided? How could I be sure that I had significance?
Currently, there are 7.2 million individuals without jobs in the U.S., as reported by the
Bureau of Labor Statistics
, with 1.5 million individuals having been without work for at least 27 weeks or longer. A lot of these people could be experiencing the exact same difficulties I went through that year.
For me, however, it was precisely this emotional strain that prompted significant changes in how I handle my professional life. These alterations have remained with me and assisted in cultivating a far more balanced connection to work.
Even if that marked the conclusion of my career, it was sufficient.
I recall an evening in May 2018 when, feeling broken-hearted and sprawled out in my parents’ basement, I had my initial awakening.
I had spent seven years as a journalist, contributing to major outlets such as The New York Times and local platforms like the Village Voice. However, despite all this work, my personal value and feelings of success remained unfulfilled.
No matter what actions I took, they were never sufficient. It seemed as though there was an enormous void inside me, and despite throwing numerous published articles into it, it remained unfilled—it just kept expanding. My professional life left me feeling hollow.
Janna Koretz, a clinical psychologist and specialist in leadership and mental health, often remarks, “Gaining perspective usually requires paying a very steep price.” She explains, “After individuals experience something challenging—whether personally or professionally—they acquire new insight from it.”
Once I realized that my career had become a sort of personal black hole, pulling all my efforts without much return, I chose to change how I viewed things. Even if I stopped getting paid for writing, I figured, what I’d accomplished up until then still warranted pride and happiness. It was sufficient as it was.
I have no proof required.
Several months afterward, the continuing
The application process was quite taxing.
Once more. I began basing all my self-worth on receiving responses from hiring managers.
A friend of mine, after experiencing a significant shift in perspective due to a severe neurological condition, shared some insights with me. He tasked me with envisioning a society where work does not exist and then compiling a list of personal traits I would contribute to this scenario. “Consider what aspects of yourself you bring to the table simply by existing,” he instructed.
“I believe that’s an excellent activity,” states Koretz, “since it makes you recognize all the aspects you contribute that aren’t related to your job.” In the setting of Koretz’s office,
Azimuth Psychological
They provide individuals with a comparable task. They present a situation where there are no available jobs but assume their clients have infinite funds, then inquire about how those individuals would proceed.
Koretz explains that this encourages individuals to “begin understanding they possess more than they believe, both within themselves and externally.” He adds that it instills considerable hope and happiness in those who experience it.
This is what I discovered when working on my friend’s assignment. I listed out eleven distinct traits including being inherently curious, inventive, always seeking happiness, among others. Within just a few days, I experienced a profound change within myself. I came to understand that loving my job and giving it my best effort wasn’t essential for defining who I am; rather, these were merely activities I engaged in daily.
Moving ahead, searching for employment became a significantly simpler task. I approached the process with more composure and clarity about how it fit into my overall life situation. My objective narrowed down to finding work that would sustain me financially and provide satisfaction. Furthermore, my self-worth wasn’t contingent upon securing a position.
I place just as much importance on all other aspects of my life, such as hanging out with friends and indulging in some creative writing during my free time. These activities serve as constant reminders of what holds significance for me.
In late 2018, I secured my position at last. While starting this new role filled me with excitement, my approach had shifted somewhat. By then, I understood that even as I relished the achievements at work, fundamentally, I didn’t have anything left to demonstrate.
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